Finding Clarity, Purpose, and Career Shifts in the Aftermath of Grief

A loss shakes everything—your sense of self, your energy, even your career path.

In this guest post, Melissa Sulley shares what it looked like to rebuild after deep grief, and how it led her to work that’s more honest, human, and aligned.

If you’ve ever found yourself questioning what you want after life turns upside down, this one’s going to hit home.

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I didn’t quit my job because I lost interest. I quit because I lost a baby. And after that, everything changed… even the career I thought I wanted.

At the time, I was working at a non-profit I loved. I spent my days creating magical experiences for children living in the inner city. It was fulfilling, purpose-driven work. But after losing my son Josiah at 20 weeks, going back felt... wrong. Disorienting. I had to keep telling people what happened. I had to pretend I was okay when I wasn’t. My identity, my energy, my soul… it all shifted.

I chose to be a stay-at-home mom with my oldest because I realized just how fleeting life really is. I needed space to rediscover myself and reorient everything I thought I knew. Thankfully, I was in a partnership that made that possible, a privilege I don’t take lightly. During that time, I started questioning everything, especially my core beliefs. The career I’d worked so hard for no longer fit the version of me that was emerging through my grief.

That season of stillness wasn’t just an intermission… it was a full-blown unraveling. And from that unraveling came clarity I didn’t know I was searching for. I didn’t want to go back to my old life. I wanted to create something new, something that honoured my loss and gave others permission to honour theirs, too.

Grief doesn’t only show up after death. It sneaks in during divorce, during faith deconstruction, in the milestones missed and the motherhood moments that never come. It lives in the empty rooms, the shifts in identity, the conversations that never happen. And when it arrives, it doesn’t just knock… it kicks the damn door down.

Sometimes grief strips you right to the studs. No masks. No pretending. Just the raw truth of what once was, and what now needs to be rebuilt. And that question it whispers, again and again: What do you actually want now?

After Josiah died, and after the heartbreak of losing several other babies in the years that followed, I started crocheting baby booties. Not to sell them. Just to survive. My hands needed something to do while my heart shattered.

That quiet, tender practice became a lifeline. Eventually, it became josiah+co.—a space to hold grief, one stitch at a time.

But it turns out, it was never really about the slippers. It was about giving language to what was unspeakable. About creating space for stories that didn’t fit inside tidy timelines or social scripts. I wasn’t just selling booties… I was building a container for heartbreak and healing.

In doing so, I found my purpose. Or maybe, it found me.

Now, I’m a Certified Grief + Loss Coach and Bereavement Doula. I sit with people in their darkest moments. I witness stories that have never been spoken aloud. I hold the weight of grief that doesn’t always come with casseroles or condolences.

This work is raw and real and sometimes heavy as hell. But it’s honest. And that honesty is what saved me… and continues to save others.

Grief has a way of calling bullshit on what no longer fits. Over and over, I’ve walked alongside folks who left jobs, shifted paths, or built something entirely new from the ashes. Because once you've faced soul shattering loss, the bullshit becomes unbearable. And suddenly, meaning matters more than metrics.

You don’t have to bounce back. You get to build forward.

If you’re not sure where to start, perhaps try sitting with this:

• What parts of your life no longer feel sustainable?

• Where are you craving softness or space?

• What if success felt like nervous system regulation… not productivity?

• What legacy are you building from your loss?

You don’t have to have it all figured out. None of us do. But if there’s a whisper inside you saying not this—not anymore, maybe it’s time to listen.

Grief doesn’t mean your career is over. It might just be the spark that leads you to work that’s more honest, more human, and more rooted in who you’ve become.

If you’re rebuilding life after loss, you don’t have to do it alone. I’d be honoured to walk alongside you.

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Melissa Sulley is a Certified Grief & Loss Coach + Bereavement Doula, and the founder of josiah+co. She resides in Hamilton, Ontario with her three living children and seven babies in the stars. Melissa offers support for those navigating pregnancy and infant loss, divorce, faith deconstruction, identity shifts, and all of life’s hardest seasons. Her current offerings include coaching, pregnancy and infant loss bereavement care, and intentional community support through events, workshops, and seasonal retreats that deepen collective awareness around how grief shapes our lives. 

You can find Melissa at @josiahandco or www.josiahandco.ca to learn more about her coaching and community offerings.